Rain, rain, go away…

come again another day. NEVER thought I’d be singing that playground rhyme around here. Most of the time I’d be thrilled for the moisture. Denver is located at the western edge of the great plains at the base of the Rocky Mountains, we are semi arid and currently at 60% of normal precipitation for this time of year. Trust me, come August when it’s day after day of 90-100 degrees, and humidity in the 8-15% range, I’ll be hoping whining for this rain.

Rain, rain...go away, come again another day!
Rain, rain…go away, come again another day!

But lately we seem to be in some sort of unusual holding pattern in the Mile High and despite the Chamber of Commerce mantra of 300 days of sunshine a year, the weather has been uncharacteristically grey and wet for several days in a row. You can imagine how ecstatic everyone was when the sun came out for about 30 minutes late yesterday afternoon. Some people at my office took off work early to run home and mow their hay fields lawns before they turned into jungles which was promptly followed by clouds and an extended shower later on in the evening. So imagine how  the conversation went this morning.

Before I recount this morning’s conversation, let me set the stage here. First, it’s pee-o’clock (otherwise know at 5:00 am), the sun isn’t quite up yet and it’s raining fairly hard. Here’s how it went down.

Me: “Ok, ok, I’m getting my shoes on, just hang on to your whiskers!”

Sam: “Oh yay, oh yay, I love this time of day!!” [bounce, bounce, bounce]

Me [opening door and Sam bursting out like he’d been shot out of canon]. Sam slamming on his brakes and skidding to the end of the covered patio. Screeeeeeech!!

Sam: “Wait, what…it’s raining. Uh, yeah…I think I’ll just stand under the eve of the house and watch.”

Me: “Come on, let’s go pee!” [spoken in an encouraging voice]

Sam: “But um…it’s wet out there. You can’t possible expect me to go stand out there and pee in the rain? Nope, not doing it. I’m going back into the house” [whereby he runs along the house under the eves so as to not get wet until he hits the covered patio and makes a mad dash to the back door.

Me:  “Oh, for heaven’s sake, you aren’t going to melt you dimwitted fur ball!” [waking back to the back door and being greeted by a tail-wagging doofus with the “Hey, I’m sure I can hold it” look on his face]. I swear, this dog has the drama down pat like a character from a Mozart opera.

I had to laugh out loud at the whole scene and we go in. I figure I’ll make some coffee to warm up and start to get ready and then we’ll go on our walk once the rain has subsided. Five minutes in and he’s bouncing up and down like a pogo stick, “Oh my god, I have to pee, I.have.to.go.pee!”

Me: “Oh, all right!” So I head toward the back door and he continues to bounce up and down like he’s about to explode. I grab his snow coat because it’s fairly waterproof. He’s wagging his whole back-end and I can’t get the buckles connected so he doesn’t pee on them and he keeps licking my face as I’m bending over trying to get him to stand still for a couple of seconds so I can hitch him all up. No sooner than I get everything all connected, he goes bouncing outside and screeches to a halt again as soon as he sees the rain which by now has diminished to a steady sprinkle now.

Sam: “Um, you know it’s still raining…you expect me to go out in that?”

Me: “GO PEE!!!”

Sam: “Well, when you put it like that, I suppose I could. I’ll check out along the fence line and then just wander down the alley a couple of houses because I don’t like the fence line spot. There’s no pee-mail to read so I can’t possible pee there.” He starts sniffing and circling, then more sniffing and circling.

And then quick like a bunny, he dashes down the alley, near a neighbor’s car and proceeds to relieve himself on a tire. Oh Gawd, I’m horrified and quickly look around to make sure no one sees him.  I catch up with him just about the time he’s finished but not before I see that contented look of relief on his face. Soon as he sees me, he breaks for the back door again. Dashing back I go to the door, let him in and he has this smug satisfied look on his face. Ha, ha, ha. Brat! 🙂

Sam: “Aren’t I a good boy?!” Tail wag.

Where did I go wrong? So…again I say, rain, rain, go away, come again another day but preferably after 6:30 in the morning so I don’t have to stand in the rain to make sure that knot-head doesn’t run after some early morning critter or stand around getting drenched in tee-shirt and PJ bottoms freezing my tukhus off and soaking my sueded slippers while I shiver in the rain waiting for him to stop being such a sissy boy.

So guess what the forecast is for this weekend? Get this…according to the National Weather Service, ‘heavy thunderstorms passing through metro area – Severe storms today, snow on Sunday.  Saturday will be an encore performance of wet and cool weather in Denver with highs staying in the mid-50s. To the west, expect snow to fall in the northern and central mountains — perhaps a foot or two.  A WINTER STORM WATCH is in effect for the Northern and Central Mountains above 9,000 feet for Saturday afternoon through Sunday morning.’

Yup, you read that right, snow on Mother’s Day! Looks like I’d better drag out the snow shovel.

Live, love, bark! <3