The Realities of Owning a Velcro Dog 

1. You learn to pee in front of a live audience.

2. You feel guilty going to work…and have frequent meetings with your ‘editor.’

3. … and getting the mail, and taking out the garbage. 

4. You must take small, cautious steps to avoid tripping.  Velcro dogs are ninjas.

5. You always check behind you before turning around (or don’t and then wonder why you didn’t). See #4

6. You get up carefully from the couch because you might step on a pup (see #4 and #). 

7. Once your dog falls asleep on or near you, it is both illegal and frowned upon to disturb him.  Even if your limbs have fallen asleep.

8. They are always close. Too close. You own stock in lint roller companies (or should) because lint rollers are your other BFF. 

9. You make plans with your pup in mind… if they can’t attend, you probably won’t want to either. 

10. That feeling you’re being watched? It’s not in your head. 

11. You find yourself bringing home presents to apologize for leaving in the first place. 

12. When you sit or lay down, so does he. Usually on top of you.

13. They’re always unintentionally photo bombing pictures. Always.

14. When you go to the park, your dog would rather be by your side than play with the other dogs. 

15. Getting into a new relationship? Good luck, because your dog already thinks he’s your significant other. 

16. Good pictures of him are impossible because he is always too close to you or constantly manages to look away just as the shutter goes off. 

17. Personal space does not exist. 

18. And you don’t care about personal space when it comes to your best friend. 

19. They all think they’re lap dogs, no matter how small your lap is or how big they are. 

20. And best of all, the hugs and kisses never, ever stop! 

Another timely contribution (with some modifications) from our quarterly newsletter, courtesy of my friend, Mary Haack. Thank you, Mary! Wishing you a weekend of fun with your Velcro pooch.

Live, love, bark! <3