The Realities of Owning a Velcro Dog
1. You learn to pee in front of a live audience.
2. You feel guilty going to work…and have frequent meetings with your ‘editor.’
3. … and getting the mail, and taking out the garbage.
4. You must take small, cautious steps to avoid tripping. Velcro dogs are ninjas.
5. You always check behind you before turning around (or don’t and then wonder why you didn’t). See #4
6. You get up carefully from the couch because you might step on a pup (see #4 and #).
7. Once your dog falls asleep on or near you, it is both illegal and frowned upon to disturb him. Even if your limbs have fallen asleep.
8. They are always close. Too close. You own stock in lint roller companies (or should) because lint rollers are your other BFF.
9. You make plans with your pup in mind… if they can’t attend, you probably won’t want to either.
10. That feeling you’re being watched? It’s not in your head.
11. You find yourself bringing home presents to apologize for leaving in the first place.
12. When you sit or lay down, so does he. Usually on top of you.
13. They’re always unintentionally photo bombing pictures. Always.
14. When you go to the park, your dog would rather be by your side than play with the other dogs.
15. Getting into a new relationship? Good luck, because your dog already thinks he’s your significant other.
16. Good pictures of him are impossible because he is always too close to you or constantly manages to look away just as the shutter goes off.
17. Personal space does not exist.
18. And you don’t care about personal space when it comes to your best friend.
19. They all think they’re lap dogs, no matter how small your lap is or how big they are.
20. And best of all, the hugs and kisses never, ever stop!
Another timely contribution (with some modifications) from our quarterly newsletter, courtesy of my friend, Mary Haack. Thank you, Mary! Wishing you a weekend of fun with your Velcro pooch.
Live, love, bark! <3
29 thoughts on “Velcro Dog”
Hi guys!!!! So sorry we have been MIA (again)! I thought I was reading about the entire Mob here HaH! I am attempting to type right now before I am off to work with Marty curled in my arms half on the key board, Abbe and Anne and Bree on my lap and legs, Ralphie on the couch behind me and Mazie on her bed right under my feet staring at me! Velcro MOB!!! I wouldn’t have it any other way I guess 🙂 Hope you have been enjoying married life and my favorite bouncing boy is doing well too!
We’ve missed you. Thanks for dropping by. It does sound like there’s Velcro galore around your crib. We are all doing great (and for the record, I didn’t get married, just happily living together 😉 )
Ahhhhh, so much the better in my book 🙂
love it and that is why I often say “Thank God for baby gates”…..(just with some of those things) 😉 DakotasDen
While I have two, I can’t bear seeing that “poor, pitiful, woe-is-me look” I see from the other side. 😉
Great post. Tippy is not a Velcro dog. She likes her personal space too. But, when she wants to cuddle, she’s great at it. She does usually follow me to the bathroom though.
What IS it about bathrooms?!
Mom says the word, “Get offa me!” a lot!
Love and licks,
Sorry, Cupcake. I’m afraid I’m with your mom. 🙂
This was hilarious!
…and oh so true!
Yes, these things are all true. Mom calls us her Secret Service.
Murphy & Stanley
I didn’t know that you could have a screw loose with velcro.
Apparently it’s possible. 😉
There are many questions in life, “Where is Sam?” doesn’t seem to be one of them. He’s always right where he should(n’t) be.
99.99% per of the time. That .01%…that’s probably when he’s chewing up an expensive wallet or something similar! 😉
I thought that I was reading about Ray! We went to a local pub the other day to ask when they were opening their patio this year, because they are literally the only place here where Carol and I can dine out… because they allow dogs on the patio! Ray will only currently allow one specific person to “sit him”, and she is not always available (and comes with a price). Velcro dog? Yup… sounds like Ray to me! 🙂
Haha, I totally see Ray as Velcro dog!
Personal space? What’s that?? 🙂 I haven’t had any since Callie came home with us – as a seven-week-old golden fluff ball – nearly 12 years ago! And I wouldn’t change a thing!
Me neither, although a ‘free zone’ in the bathroom would be welcome. 😉
very funny, and true. #10
oh and wonder why I’m up at 5 am? Cole can’t stop flapping his ears despite a prescription antihistamine at 10, and a benedryl 30 min ago. Pollen is ridiculous right now, but not in our bedroom…
Oh no, so sorry the pollen grinch is bugging sweet Cole. Those ear flap sessions are maddening at night. ღ
that’s a very familiar fact… and the highlight is when he tries to climb on my lap while I’m busy… :o)
It’s as though you have a permanent lap throw over your thighs with these big dogs. Even at this moment, Sam’s head on on my thigh which is the precursor to the left leg, then the right leg crawling across my lap. Oh that dog! 😉
funny and….supertrue 🙂
And neither of us would want it any different I suspect!