Theft Tuesday

Hello, is this the police department? It’s me, Elsa, the Ninja. I wish to report a theft. Over the weekend there was a conspiracy with my mom to steal my furs! Mom has been saying that I looked like a Muppet but she never said they would steal my furs!

Police Dispatcher: Um, ma’am…we don’t handle that kind of theft. I think you better take it up with your mom.

Me: Well I never! Maybe you guys can tell me what to do about this highway robbery?!

Since mom brought me home 8 months ago, she’s been trying to keep my luxurious coat looking it’s best. I let her trim me up a couple of times but it just isn’t my cup of kibble to have the water works, clipper and hairdryer so mom has been using scissors lately, but I’m so over her feeble attempts.

Luckily my big brother told me what to expect since he donated his furs earlier in the week so he could work at the hospital. He’s used to it and both mom and the groomer say he’s a good boy at it. Pfft! Good boy, ha…that’s laughable. He’s so dumb he just doesn’t know any better. Resist, I say!!

Should have figured out there was something rotten in Denmark going on since I got to go for a ride by myself. So here I am with Rebecca (Sam’s groomer when mom doesn’t spiff him up). She nice and all and I liked her, but I mean, criminy…she seems a bit too happy making me nekked with scissors, clippers and a hair drying that sounded like it was going to take off Yikes!! Oh sure, she  seems all nice and everything, but people…come on…she’s stealing my filthy beautiful furs! What does she need them for, I ask? They don’t keep her warm. And they don’t go with her red hair. I think my expression say it all  (even if you can’t  see my eyes for all the fur).

There was a girl who had ‘a little curl…right in the middle of her forehead’

But it got worse. I had to endure water on top of the theft! I was willing to drip dry, then Rebecca said we should ‘just try the dryer out’ to see how I’d do. I’ll tell you how I’d do. I’d freaked out…that’s how I’d do. But actually, truth be told, I didn’t do too badly according to Rebecca who let mom stay with me just in case I had a seizure from the stress. She talked nicely to both me and mom and said I was a good girl and only got upset when the dryer was close to my ears.

After the drying, Rebecca finished up the detail work and spiffed me up nicely. She even removed that little curl in the middle of my forehead. Her and mom couldn’t stop laughing about that. Wish I sure knew what was so dang funny about it? More stolen fur if you ask me!

All and all it wasn’t the worst thing to happen and I do smell really good now if I say so myself and mom can’t stop hugging on me. Even my dimwit brother has been checking me out, catching a sniff here and there. Mom got a new bandana out and said hot pink went pawfectly with the new shiny trimmed furs. Waddu think? Look, I even have eyeballs!

I’m still keeping the police on speed dial, just in case we have to go through this theft business again any time soon. At least my toys comforted me. Have you been a victim of this kind of crime?

Live, love, bark! ❤︎

70 thoughts on “Theft Tuesday

  1. BellaDharma's LadyMew

    Meow meow Elsa you look beeuteefull with yore furss dun yore pink bandana….Maybee THE Groo-murr lady keepss all yore fursss (an sam’ss an othersss) an makess fur pillows!! LadyMew used to do that…
    ***purrsss*** BellaDharma

    Reply
  2. Rowena

    Hi Elsa,
    Our remaining dog, Lady, has been lucky so far to avoid the clippers, but that’ll change once Spring comes round. On the other hand, Bilbo was shawn a few times and I thought you might enjoy readig about it here: https://beyondtheflow.wordpress.com/2015/02/14/click-go-the-shears-dog/ and https://beyondtheflow.wordpress.com/2015/02/15/if-only-a-dog-coat-had-a-zip/
    It is sad thinking about losing Bilbo still. He will always be a part of our family.
    xx Rowena

    Reply
  3. Jan K

    You look beautiful, Elsa! Luckily our two are of the breeds that don’t need trimming. Baths alone are enough drama around here. LOL

    Reply
  4. Forest Poodles

    That very same crime happened just yesterday to Teddy and Luna! There must be an uptick on fur thefts across the country! On the plus side, you look gorgeous!

    Reply
  5. KB

    I think you look gorgeous! And you even handled the blow dryer. Wow!!!! No way would Shyla stay in the room for that! But, as a Lab, she doesn’t have to go to the groomer (phew). Way to go!

    Reply
  6. alexalily

    Elsa i hear ya girlfriend! last Sunday daddy stole my fur. said it will help me stay cooler in hot weather. don’t know about that as its been cold an wet this week. anyhows..mom an dad say i look so cute. what we girls have to go thru..but dad was so proud of how well i stood still for him made it worth it.
    your pics show you looking real pretty.
    nose bump from lily.

    Reply
  7. Anarette

    Oh woman, that does sound serious. If you want headquarters to investigate, just say the word. I do anything for a pretty woman like you. Benji

    Reply
  8. somethingwagging

    Your lucky your moms found a groomer who cares about how you feel. Of course, she probably doesn’t read the blog so she doesn’t know what you said about her after your haircut. 🙂

    Reply
  9. Cristina Crawford

    You look pretty-n-pink marvelous! And to be quite frank, what’s more traumatizing is getting a poor, lop-sided grooming!! We have had, unfortunately, one too many of those!

    Reply
  10. pibblelife

    Yowzers!!! That sounds so traumatizing! My bff Wilhelmina must be going through the same thing when her humom takes her to the groomers! But even after all that stress, you look GORGEOUS!!!!! <3

    Reply
    1. Tails Around the Ranch

      Thanks Ms. Mia. I hope Ms. Wilhelmina has it easier than me. Mom was worried I’d get myself so worked up I’d have a seizure so she stayed with me. Luckily I have a short memory where mom and treats are concerned on some of that bad stuff.

      Reply
  11. Dakota/Caren/Cody

    Elsa you look pawsitively GORGEOUS and this post was hilarious!!! At least your Mom doesn’t tie in shots AND bloodwork like my Mom does! I get a DOUBLE WHAMMY because my grooming is attached to my Vet! (same owners!)………but….I have to tell you, I am sooooooo vain I happen to LOVE being groomed! Barks and licks and love, Dakota

    Reply
  12. lapaylor

    poor elsa… it’s a poodle’s life to suffer for beauty. At least your legs are so long you don’t need to wear heels.

    Reply
      1. Tails Around the Ranch

        We’ll probably always have to be cautious with the epilepsy shadow ever present. I’ll have to get better at keeping her look good. Poodles seem to know when they’re dandys and prance accordingly.

  13. Amy

    You better not come to our house, Elsa. People actually PAY MOM MONEY to do this to their pups. You are a pretty girl, though. 🙂 Lucy

    Reply
  14. Genevieve Petrillo

    Your eyeballs are a definite plus, E. You look altogether amazing after the theft. I have never been trimmed, but the bath is bad enough for me. I draw the line at the hair dryer, though. Mom says I will give myself a heart attack with that thing. I’m sure that treatment will never happen to you again!

    Love and licks,
    Cupcake

    Reply
  15. edgar62

    Aww – you were really nice to begin with, now, with the Pink Bandanna and all, you look really beautiful. And well, the extra fur made you look – dare I say it??? – a little on the fat side. Not a good look for someone as beautiful as you. I think you might be just a tad harsh on the mama – cause if you think about it, she really did you a big favour…

    Reply
  16. easyweimaraner

    Elsa I look for my sherlock holmes cap and I will find the fur-snitcher… and I bring a dress, so you haven’t to go nekked till I find your fur back.. and then the thief has to glue efurry single hair back ;o)

    Reply

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