Category Archives: Monday Musings

Monday Musings ~ January 14, 2019

So THAT’S the issue? Guess it’s obvious now the problem is I am owned by I own a Standard Poodle, when what I really need is an automatic.

Standard vs. Automatic

Here’s hoping your week starts off with a chuckle.

Live, love, bark! 🐾

Monday Musings ~ January 7, 2019

Looks like someone else gained some weight over the holidays. I think I know that feeling.

Holiday weight gain

Who you calling chubby?

Live, love, bark! 🐾

Not At All Wordless Wednesday~ January 2, 2019

2019. Just the sound of it sounds promising, doesn’t it? But it’s not at all natural to type  just yet, let alone say and it will probably take a couple of week’s of practice before I scribble over 2018 on checks in favor of adding the correct year.

Happy New Year, Blogville. We at the Ranch hope you survived the ‘howlidays’ and they were full of joy. Between all the special food, drinks, and good cheer with friends and family, you just might want to hold off looking for that bathroom scale just yet (you may remember I thought of hiding mine here as a viable strategy for that fudge holiday weight gain).

Enter the period of time where making resolutions is the blueprint we often begin the new year. Welcome, resolution month. I’m not big on making resolutions preferring setting goals with a specific plan, but I do try to become more conscious about healthy living and eating. How can you not? With the arrival of bitter cold temps in the single digits with windchill over the past few days, outside exercise has been limited but here’s a strategy that might help.

Snowmen humor

Have a wonderful first week of 2019. Your slate has been wiped clean to create a whole new direction where you can go. What’s your plan? And if you make New Year’s resolutions, do they work for you? Any tips to share? Here’s to a happy, healthy 2019!

Live, love, bark! 🐾

Monday Musings ~ December 31, 2018

Every New Year’s Eve mom gathers us to have ‘the talk’ where she goes over, for the umpteenth time, “rules for poodles.” Elsa here. “Like we’ve heard it all before, mom.” Besides, we know “poodles rule” anyway. This year I decided to beat her to the punch before she starts whining waxing on about her stupid rules.

🦴 Yes, mom, we know it’s called a walk. In Doglish we think that means a ‘sniff’ and a leisurely one at that when the temperatures are extra cold. Chilled  leaves and grass smell much different, trust us.

🦴 Of course we know that minding our leash manners is impawtant for everyone’s safety and that it’s not necessary to dash after every cat or squirrel we encounter. Don’t blame us…explain the rules to the cats and squirrels. We know exactly what to do. Can we help it if they don’t want to ‘chat’ with us?

🦴 Walking exercises.  Sometimes the sidewalk ends and we have to walk out in the street so Sam and I think that’s the pawfect time to extend our leashes in opposite directions so you have to rein us in. It’s called upper arm strengthening exercises. Have you looked in the mirror lately and checked out that flab dripping off your triceps like a wet bag of mice? You’re welcome.

🦴 As for when you’re picking up our poop, we’ve got other things on our minds. And most often that involves walking behind you to get our bearings. you’re on your own. 💩  Besides, I always thought moms had eyes in the back of their heads to keep an eye out on us. Guess I got that wrong.

🦴 Follow the leader to us in Doglish means something more like that cool Fleetwood Mac song…Go Your Own Way. Oh sure, you’re barking ‘heel’ but you need to start thinking of Sam more like Lindsey Buckingham. They’re both weirdos.

🦴 Yes, we pestered you to take us for a walk and jumped around like pogo sticks till we left and then s-l-o-w-l-y meandered around on said walk like we could care less. It’s called a poodle agenda. Sheesh, don’t you ever read the editor meeting memos where we clearly spelled that out?

🦴 In the winter when sunlight on our early walks isn’t in plentiful supply, we are quite sure that shadow we saw IS too a serial killer, therefore barking is imperative for everyone’s safety. The neighbors need to get up and get to work anyway.

🦴 And while we’re on the topic of safety, I know for a fact that all Akitas will trigger insanity on my part. You can call it racial profiling if you like, but  blame the next door Akita, not me. He’s already proved that he would tear down the fence if he could. I know his crazy MO and will act accordingly whenever we encounter others of the same breed, irrespective if they’re nice or not. I gotta let all dogs know not to mess with this Chica. Us Ninjas have a reputation to uphold. Maybe you should think about carrying more treats in your pocket for distraction purposes. Just saying.

🦴 Nose nudging while you’re trying to paint. Hey, we’re just improving your lame artwork. Picasso probably had interns, so chill. If you painted with acrylics instead of those unforgiving watercolors, you could save yourself a lot of aggravation. Then again, if you petted us enough, we wouldn’t need to remind you.

There are probably other areas where we rule, but am sure when you least expect it, we’ll be sure to remind you so that you might eventually ‘get it,’ by pointing out who really rules around the Ranch. That’s called training, woman and you need lots of it.

We wish everyone a Happy New Year. Let us know when we’re gonna pop open the Dog Perignon, Sam and I will get the hors d’oeuvres ready for ringing in 2019 with some serious style.

Live, love, bark! 🐾

Monday Musings ~ December 24, 2018

No matter how you celebrate or whether you’ve been naughty or nice, everyone at the Ranch wishes you merry days, a heart that’s light, family and friends, a season that is bright and filled with joy, peace and love.

Merry Christmas

Live, love, bark! 🐾

Monday Musings ~ December 17, 2018

We hope you had a wonderful weekend making preparations for Santa Paw’s arrival. Sam here, mom finally got her tush in gear and is mostly caught up. Are you ready for that big guy in red to show up? I’m gonna try out for a position with his reindeer. Think I have a chance?

Have a wooftastic week!

Live, love, bark! 🐾

Monday Musings ~ December 10, 2018

After posing in front of this neighbor’s blow-up Santa Paws a few days earlier, Sam was somewhat confused when we passed by it over the weekend and it was deflated. He kept sniffing around to see what happened. Maybe he’s worried there may not be presents for him and the Ninja. It took some reassuring but I think he’s okay now. Elsa on the other hand was thrilled as the man in the red suit freaked her out.

Deflated Santa Paws

Hope yours was a fun-filled weekend. We’re off to visit patients again the next few days so I’ll probably be late with comments. Have a good week!

Live, love, bark! 🐾

Monday Musings ~ December 3, 2018

Eep…is it really December?!?! It just doesn’t seem possible, does it? If you were out holiday shopping this weekend, you just might a bit like this. Then again, if you’re like me, you probably feel that way whenever you’re out and about. *Sigh*

Here’s wishing you a great week.

Live, love, bark! 🐾

Monday Musings ~ November 26, 2018

We hope your howliday was full of good cheer, the best of tasty noshings and comfortable elastic pants. Did you gobble till you wobbled? Ours was nice and quiet which allowed us to reflect upon all our blessings and being especially grateful for all of you. Hopefully you survived Black Friday. Today is known as Cyber Monday following the Thanksgiving weekend and we invite you to swing by the e-shop.

Enjoy those Thanksgiving dinner leftovers this week!

Live, love, bark! 🐾

Veterans Day Monday

Veterans DayYesterday marked the 100th anniversary of the end of World War I where major hostilities formally ended at the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918, and the Armistice with Germany went into effect. In the US, the public holiday is celebrated today allowing for a 3-day weekend. Most governmental offices, schools and banks are closed, and mail delivery will be halted. The holiday was signed into law by President Dwight Eisenhower on May 26, 1954 honoring all veterans who served in the Armed Forces. Typically celebrated as Remembrance Day or Armistice Day in European countries,  Major US veteran organizations urged the day be renamed Veterans Day in 1954 and thus Congress amended the bill on June 1, 1954, replacing “Armistice” with “Veterans,” and it has been known as Veterans Day ever since. The attributive case (rather than the possessive) is the officially correct spelling “because it is not a day that ‘belongs’ to veterans, but rather a day to honor all veterans. Using the apostrophe is however grammatically correct.

Today we celebrate the service of all U.S. military veterans, while May’s Memorial Day honors those who died while in military service.

The Ranch hands and I tip our hats to all veterans who have served their country and hope this opportunity brings people together. As you probably heard, we had an election last week, one that has continued to further rip into the democracy that binds us. I pray we can use this day to stitch back that torn fabric through service intended to help others. Until we can accept everyone for their differences, we will never recognize the areas where we are the same. A country where we all long for safety for our families and our country. Where we all breathe the same air and enjoy the freedom provided by those who served their entire country, and not just those who agree with their political stripes. Today we pray that the process of coming together as a nation begins.

Veterans Day

Live, love, bark! 🐾